Murray Is Alive And Well!
I was just about to bang on about National Pigeon Appreciation Day and how it took me over a week to recover, but it’ll have to wait. Something way more important came up.
Remember my pigeon pal in London from years ago, Murray? The Andy Murray fan who used to fly to Wimbledon every year to watch his hero play? Remember how he’d lost it back in 2012 and was living as a recluse on the roof on Centre Court? Click on the link to read more.
I heard from him the other day, totally out of the blue, and all is well. Excellent in fact, which is a massive relief. Since the shock of the shooting followed by the arrival of the hawks, particularly Rufus, he decided Wimbledon sucked and moved to Scotland to be nearer to his idol. Apparently he spends Christmases in Dunblane hoping to catch a glimpse of Andy spending time with his family, and then the rest of the year in Edinburgh. Reckons, weather aside, the place rocks. He also mentioned it took him a week to get there. That’s what I call dedication.
“Wimbledon just wasn’t fun anymore.” He said. “Pigeons don’t dare go there, which is a shame for those of us who were genuine tennis fans. I realised last year that the stress of if all had finally got to me. I had to move. I watch the matches on the screens up here or I look through pub windows. Much safer.” He also said he was still getting to grips with the Scottish accent. Don’t blame him on that one.
He sent me this. It’s a pic of him in a place called Hunter Square:
Considering this is what he looked in 2012, I’d say the move to Scotland was just what he needed:
He asked if I’d go up for a visit. I said I might if Andy Murray reaches the final again.
Obviously I’m hoping that won’t happen as it’s one fuck of a fly, but hearing that Andy Murray has just gone through to the next round, I may need to start warming up.
Good to hear from you, pal. Bet you’ll be partying hard tonight. Have one on me.
National Pigeon Appreciation Day 2014
It’s that time of year again. National Pigeon Appreciation Day is tomorrow – Friday June 13th. Unlucky for some, but not for us. Bring it on.
We didn’t do much last year as we’d only just moved to the seaside but, back in 2012, celebrations in London rocked the big one. Ended up with a massive rave-up in Trafalgar Square. Even Club Foot Earl was giving it large on the dance floor and, thanks to Fat Nige finding a puddle of beer, everyone got suitably twatted. Then there was the fly-by led by Roger from Lewisham. Genius. We were all quite emotional by that point I seem to remember.
This year, however, I’m a bit concerned at the organisation, or lack of. In London we spent months in planning, but when I went down to see what the committee sorting out this year’s Brighton celebrations were up to, this is what I found:
Jesus.
It’s the one day we pigeons get to celebrate being pigeons, and this lot looked like they couldn’t organise a crumb up in a bakery. I offered to help telling them I’d been heavily involved in previous years in London, but they didn’t seem to be interested. All they wanted to do was organise some more meetings. Load of bollocks considering the fucking day is tomorrow.
Then, even worse, I went down to the seafront and found this lot. They’ve been booked by the ‘committee’ to do some ‘Buddhist formation mime’. WTF? Formation mime?
I asked for a demonstration, and this is what they did:
Oooo. Walking around. That’s good. Not.
Is that it? Really?
This is their leader Jerryvasanano (his Buddhist name, apparently!), grabbing five minutes mid-rehearsal meditation:
And this is what he said when he stopped meditating and I asked him what the hell was going on:
“It’s a demonstration of the struggles facing pigeons in everyday life in order to help us gain insights to end our suffering through the elimination of ignorance and craving by way of understanding and seeing of dependent origination with the ultimate goal of attainment of the sublime state of nirvana”.
May as well have been talking fucking Dutch. All they did was walk about a bit, stand there, then walk about a bit. Fucking stupid and the kind of thing that makes me want to move back to London immediately. Give me a mass piss up any day.
So, I’m taking it upon myself to make sure those Brighton pigeons who want to party hard, can. I’m on it. Venue tbc. Watch this space.
As for last Saturday’s meeting to discuss the issues surrounding the number of seagulls – see last post – we decided to postpone it due to Kemptown Carnival and the fact most pigeons would be going to that for some fine Shit or Miss action, and it was fine let me tell you. Mart scored a direct hit on some Spaniard’s burrito. Pissed ourselves. Looked like a creamy topping.
As for the tour of Gerald’s art, seeing as I’ve got my work cut out organising a half decent Pigeon Appreciation Day party, I’m going to meet Monty next week. Can’t cover it all and, far as I’m concerned, partying like a pro takes precedence every time.
Birthday Over, And It’s On With Some Direct Pigeon Action
Long time no post. Still, better late than never. I partly blame it on the build up to my birthday. It’s on May 26th. Trouble is the older I get, the longer the celebrations seem to last, or rather the longer it takes to recover.
Put it this way, this was Shoreham Steve on the 27th:
Pretty much stayed there for two whole days he was that bad.
We’d kicked it off on the pier and it all went downhill from there. Mart found a cup with some local brew at the bottom, and that was it, we were flying all over the place. Literally.
Anyway, it’s June now and back to business. I’ve got an afternoon coming up with Monty (see previous post). He’s got permission from Gerald to show me a couple more of his art works. NYC Gary’s been on it too. Apparently he’s moved into more of a ‘conceptual phase’, whatever the hell that means.
Exciting times. I’m also hoping the sun might join us at some point. I seem to remember this time last year we were hurtling towards a heatwave. This year, so far, not so good.
Other news is I’m getting stuck in to some serious action. Haven’t done that for a while. For those of you who don’t know, I’ve been pretty successful in the past with my ‘Give Pigeons A Chance’ campaign back in 2006. There was also the very necessary ‘Operation Stop The Squirrel’ in 2009 in reaction to their newly found love of martial arts – click on the link if you don’t believe me. We rocked it large on that one including a massive protest fly by. Pigeons from all over came to it. Good times.
Now I’m living in Brighton though, it’s all about the seagull and the sheer numbers of them flocking over here giving it large. There’s a meeting on Saturday in Queen’s Park for any pigeons up for airing their views. You don’t have to be local, and we want to hear from as many of you as possible. Personally, I’ve had a gut full of their shouting about the place behaving like they own the town. It starts at 10am. Then, if you fancy it, you can join us for some Shit or Miss at the Kemptown Carnival. Right laugh last year. Just sit on a ledge and take your pick. Bring it on.
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