The Robins Are Revolting
Got chatting to a Robin Redbreast earlier, something I usually avoid at all costs due to their small angry bird issues and, let me tell you, this one was proper angry, but for good reason as it turns out. Looks like the Robin has officially slipped down the rankings of birds most likely to visit your garden, and the Wood Pigeons are moving in. What the fuck? Woodies taking over the urban turf? Outrageous. Guess it was only a matter of time considering how dull it is in most rural areas…
Anyway, not that I didn’t trust him, despite his name being Eugene, but I looked it up and he’s right:
“When the BTO’s survey began in 1995, wood pigeons were the 11th most common bird; this year they have risen to number three, behind blackbirds and blue tits, but ahead of robins at number four.”
The Top 10 birds most likely to shit in your garden list now looks like this:
2 Blue tit
3 Wood pigeon
6 Great tit
7 Collared dove
9 House sparrow
After I managed to calm him down I told him that there really wasn’t much point in getting wound up seeing as there was fuck all he could do about it. Take on a Blue Tit, sure. Punch out a Chaffinch, maybe, but a Woodie? Forget it. I did promise, however, that if they start moving out of the gardens onto the streets, then it’s fucking war, which seemed to make him feel better.
In the meantime, I remain vigilant and will be watching out for an increase in scenes like this:
A Woodie on the rampage.