Kingston Pigeons On The Run
Heard it on the grapevine about how pigeons in Kingston are up for the cull – didn’t think much of it – Kingston pigeons are usually a bit up their own arse – especially the ones that say they’re from Richmond. Kingston’s a bit of a suburban nightmare – so just reckoned they were bored and probably up for a bit of attention…
Then I got sent this from Spike and Mandy. Jesus Christ. Totally outraged. Even if they are a bit puffed up – they so don’t deserve to be shot by a fucking marksman!
The ‘town centre manager’, Graham McNally, said: “At this moment in time, a specialist marksman will be used to shoot the pigeons. I can definitely say there will be no gassing and no poisoning. The cull will be carried out discreetly.”
Discreelty? Eh? There’s nothing fucking discreet about some maniac roaming the streets of Kingston with a dirty great rifle! Word on the street is Graham’s just pissed he only got to manage a town centre and is taking it out on the pigeons.
Anyway – me & Mart decided to go check it out for ourselves, and bumped into this dude:
Name’s Alan. Reckons there’s a mass evacuation underway. Pigeons everywhere are shitting it and doing a runner to Isleworth – poor fucks.
Mart made me put this one in. He took it. Reckons it ‘captures the scene’.