The weather sucks, giant pigeons and a very gay lamp
Sorry for the lack of posts – Norm decided to get the decorators in. Fuck knows why coz his office is the size of a match box. Tbh he could probably have done it himself with tip ex. Anyway, was gonna head to Ali’s in Slough till I got this yesterday from Sally the B.A.P. reporter.
This is Sally:
“Dear Brian. I wouldn’t go flying about today if I were you. I just did, and it was so windy I nearly blew into a tree. I also heard there were a couple of near misses over the M4. Kind Regards, Sally.”
Cheers for that one, Sal.
Mart’s been bored shitless. He’s been hanging out with his new pal Trev playing super heroes. It all went weird though when he found a paper napkin in the road and decided to make himself “the best invisible cloak”. I haven’t managed to get a pic of him yet – but he totally thinks it works. The other day he and walked straight into Starbucks so he could shit on the floor for a laugh – only made it as far as the front door before he was almost knocked unconscious by a blueberry muffin.
And here’s another one of Sande’s pals. Turns out Sande’s from Australia, not the US – which explains alot. Australia is full of freaky killer shit – spiders, snakes, sharks and… FUCKING GREAT GIANT PIGEONS:
Jesus Christ. She caught this one staring through her window the other day. Scary shit – live off sheep, apparently.
Finally, Fritz and Patricia sent me this. Cheers guys!:
A really fucking gay pigeon lamp.
Not sure why it’s only got one leg and has to stand on a peg with a tube hanging out of its arse… if you wanna buy one – go here. It’s only 55 quid and comes in grey, black, pink, orange and yellow. Lovely.