Friday Fun For Pigeons – ‘Shit or Miss’

Ok – Mart’s getting bored with this whole ‘shall I go to LA’ thing, so prob off to Hoxton later for a spot of poetry with my poetry pals – not done that for a couple of weeks. Told Mart he could come too – so long as he makes an effort.

Also promised Mart a game of ‘Shit or Miss’. Am guessing you’ve never heard of it, so here’s how it works:

You fly along a big road – like the A4 – and shit on cars. Different colour cars get different scores. Hit the roof and it’s a max, hit the windscreen and you get a bit less, hit the drivers side, and it’s a bit more, and so on. If the traffic is jammed, you get points knocked off for missing.

As you know, shitting on command is tricky, so scoring points in ‘Shit or Miss’ requires skill.

Here’s some examples:

This get’s double max points – it’s red AND a sports car – even more if the roof’s down and you hit the back seat – fucking hard to do.

Lowest points – big, white and a piece of piss to shit on.

Fucking cool game, and very, very funny.

March 31, 2006. Uncategorized.


  1. fritz replied:

    You bastards……

  2. pigeonblog replied:

    Fritz: Am thinking maybe we can get pigeon sized ones and use them as prizes in ‘Shit or Miss’?!
    Your pal
    Bri P

  3. Annie Mole replied:

    Hey Brian came across your blog the other week – particularly liked your entry about the Tube and thanks for linking to my blog

    I think I saw you on the District Line the other week – well either you or Mart, do you ever travel round Earl’s Court & Hammersmith. There’s also a load of your mates who get on at Hammersmith but on the Hammersmith & City Line end.

    Can you also try to avoid my car if you fly over West London again. Whenever you’ve been eating blackberries or someother purple stuff your shit’s a bugger to get off!

  4. Ooglaser replied:

    Really nice cars, you know 😀 Except the last one then 😉

  5. pigeonblog replied:

    Hi Annie Mole: Tbh I’ve been avoiding the green line for a while. It’s been bad lately. The pink one from Hammersmith is good. Usually realiable and easily get on and offable. Sorry about the car thing. Adding blackberries is a part of the ‘Shit or Miss’ game. The darker the shit, the better you can see if you’ve got as hit or not. I’ll pass the word on about avoiding your car. What colour is it?
    Your pal
    Brian P

    Ooglaser: Got a great one the other day. Red Ferrari 360 Modena. Top of the range, direct hit – middle of the roof. Cool!
    Your pal
    Brian P

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