A Trip to Dick’s Place
Figure I need to do a load more pecking around on this going to LA thing. The only pigeon I know who's been is Dicky the Turd. Did some race there a while back. Reason I know is I chatted Linda up when he was away. She was having none of it, and then Dicky only went and won a fucking trophy. Sun's shone out of his feathery arse ever since. Yesterday though, decided to igore the fact he's a knob, and go talk to him. Thankfully he never found out about the Linda thing. Phew.
So me and Mart winged it to his place. Mart reckoned about an hour's fly – turned out nearly two which included getting lost and having to ask a robin for directions. Shame up.
Did a spot of therming down the M40 – kinda like surfing, but on thermals – which was cool.
Got there and all a bit of a waste of time tbh. He was in his 'loft' all cosied up. Apparently he's in training. Knob. Anyway, he reckoned it's a fucking nightmare journey. Ten hours in a shitty little box with nothing but a pile of cases and the odd dog to keep you company and, unless it's a terrier, coz they're normally quite a laugh, it's boring as fuck. Then, when you get there, it's meant to be night – but it's not – it's day. Eh? He said this makes your brain go weird and you end up flying like a twat. Not good. Not good at all.
You'll love this though – he made it for Linda. Jesus.