Welcome To My World!

Just seen I’m getting traffic from Boing Boing – fucking cool – thanks guys. You rock. Thought I’d better explain some stuff to anyone who’s not been before…

My name is Brian and I am a real pigeon who blogs.

This is me – I’m the one at the front – racing best mate Mart for some pancake.

Me and Mart racing for a bit of pancake.

Pigeonblog is my diary – diary of a London pigeon. Tbh I thought there’d be a load of us out there when I first started… Had trouble getting going though – got chucked out of my first Cyber Caff for dropping feathers – what did they expect for fuck’s sake – also shat on a keyboard once – error. Got taken in by Ali – top dude from Slough who got me well set up in my own office – even gave me a cork board for notes and stuff.

Anyway – flying up and down the M4 got on my tits – esp as it’s fucking freezing over here – not too bad when the summer thermals kick in but man, it sucks when it’s cold. Got to thinking about launching a range of fleece jackets for pigeons – we fucking hate the cold and no one gives a shit. Working on this with a mate from the US – Mr Wolf.
Started life in Hayes – a double boring shithole West of London – recently moved into town though – which rocks. Living on Beak Street in Soho above a top Med bistro with my best mate Mart – the one in the pancake pic. Mart used to take all the pics but, frankly, he’s a bit shit – so I got a mate Del – top homeboy pigeon mate from Brixton to get me my own cam, so I mainly take all my own pics now.

This blog thing started off as a bit of a laugh really – now dealing with a few issues – esp as I seem to be the only blogging pigeon in London. Like the Ken thing – our fuckwit mayor who’s trying to get rid of us pigeons. As if. Used to be a top hang out called Trafalgar Square – so he gets some arsewipe hawk doing the rounds. Jesus Christ. Any other world and this would be a fucking crime against humanity – so launched my ‘Give Pigeons a Chance’ campaign as a result – seems to be going alright. Please sign it if you have a min.
Then there’s this Bird Flu shit – we pigeons never even get a sniffle never mind fucking flu and suddenly there’s this big anti-pigeon vibe going down. Came up with my own simple solution which I sent to Ken – so far – no reply. Twat. The only pigeons he leaves be are the TPs – specially trained tourist pigeons – generally a bunch of up their own arse snobs – apart from Terry – he’s alright.

Also dealing with the air pullution tracking shit – some knob’s idea of sending a bunch of 20 poor pigeon fucks into space to see if the air stinks. Had my own thoughts on this too…

So that’s me. Bit of a rant from time to time – dealing with pigeon issues – generally loving life as a pigeon esp now I’ve gone Central. Oh, btw, I used to be called Simon till a bunch of pigeon mates from Hoxton told me to change it. Me and Mart go there sometimes on a Friday night to talk poetry and eat throwaway – anyway, they’re all named after poets so I called myself Brian, after Brian Patten.

March 12, 2006. Uncategorized.

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