Happy Christmas From Brian Pigeon

Well. We made it through another year. Amazing considering the weather. Never seen a storm like it. Unbelievable. Puddles the size of lakes, and the most mental winds ever. Flying anywhere was absolutely out of the question, as Ed found out to his peril.

This was Ed a few days ago:

Unfortunately Ed had no idea the wind was as strong as it was. He took off just before a massive gust hit and was last seen hurtling towards the French coast. Looks like it’s Christmas in Calais for Ed. Good luck with that one, mate.

So today, seeing as the sun’s out, I will mainly be hanging out with Mart trying to find something half decent to eat. Not holding my breath though seeing as everywhere is closed, so it’ll probably end up being a bin day. That’s the downside of being a pigeon at Christmas. Anyone out there fancy popping out a few festive leftovers, I’m sure they would be much appreciated.

In the meantime, Happy Christmas.

Your pal


December 25, 2013. Uncategorized. 6 comments.

Gary Pigeon’s New York Studio

I heard from Gary Pigeon yesterday – see previous posts. He says he’s hard at work on his new piece. Interestingly he also says he’s taking more of an ‘inclusive’ approach to this one by exploring the medium of ‘living art’, possibly involving a number of other pigeons who have either had foot issues themselves, or know a pigeon who has. He’s hoping to have it ready by Christmas. Nice one, Gary. Watch this space.

When I emailed him last I also asked about living and working conditions in New York. It sounds like it’s pretty much the same as it is here. A mixture of ledges, window sills, and derelict shitholes. He said he’d rather not publicise where he lives now as he’s managed to bag himself a rather choice hole near Brooklyn Bridge. The reason he wants to keep it quiet is squatting can be a real issue for any urban pigeon who lands on his feet. I know from experience. There’s nothing worse than coming home after a busy day to find some other fucker sitting there going, “So, what you gonna do about it?”

Normally the squatting pigeon wins. More hassle than it’s worth. I was lucky though. It happened to me twice when I was living on Beak Street. All I did was stick my camera up their beak and say I’d name and shame unless they fucked off, which they did on both occasions.

Even though Gary wouldn’t tell me where he lived, he did email me a picture of his studio:

That’s Gary’s on the far right. The rest are all artists too.

It’s located under The Highline, a recently tarted up disused railway in the meat-packing district.

The reason Gary chose to work there is he used to live there back in the day. Said it rocked before the hotels moved in. Parties every night. Pigeons from all over NY would hit the Highline on a Friday night, and most of them would still be there on Monday morning.

“Now it’s just a load of designer frontages, and not a bloody ledge in sight!” He said. “I prefer to live in Brooklyn these days. Most of the pigeons who work here are sound though, which is why I work here. It’s a good scene. We all get on and help each other. Last year Michael was working on an Origami piece involving a paper napkin. It took three of us to sort the final folds. It’s team work here, and that’s why I like it.”

Fair play.

Looking forward to the new piece, Gary.

December 5, 2013. Uncategorized. 1 comment.

More From Gary, And Other Pigeons Who Do Art

Following the massive response to NYC Gary’s street art – see previous post – I’ve had loads of emails from him. As his typing skills leave a bit to be desired some of them are quite hard to work out, like this one:

‘deeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrr briiiiiiiiiiiiiannnnn hhhhhhoooooowweeee aattttttteeee uuuuuu?’

In fact, most of them are like this. Clearly hasn’t quite got the tap and lift technique down yet. How long one stands on a letter has to be perfectly timed, or this is what happens. Slipping off the letter is also easy to do. Believe me, it’s a skill I’ve had to practice, a lot. Still, what he lacks in the typing department doesn’t detract from his artistic genius.

He says he’s working hard on his next piece having been hugely inspired by his new found UK fanbase. He promises not to disappoint and will send a photo when he’s finished. He asked if I wanted to come to the private view. I said I wished I could, but hiding in the fuselage of a jumbo jet didn’t really appeal. This was his suggestion as it was how he unintentionally ended up in New York in the first place. Brilliant. Looking forward to that story, although it will probably take me a year to decipher.

He also sent me this picture of himself on a bollard just near Central Park. He says this particular one is where he goes to reflect. He also mentioned the view is normally a bit better than it is here:

“Sometimes I just need to have some time on my own.” He said. “Even though the rest of the world around me is very busy, I find this spot both peaceful and conducive to creative thought. I think the shackles attached to the post help me to feel grounded.”

I’m looking forward to hearing a lot more from Gary.

Having launched the pigeons doing art theme, I’ve had emails from a couple over here too. I found this one particularly impressive. Stephen ‘Pigasso’ Pigeon works with canvass, and he doesn’t just use his feet. The wings are involved too. Brave stuff. Apparently he wipes them in the paint and then drags them across the canvass to create, as he puts it, “A visual effect that reflects the subtle texture of reality.”

Not sure I got this, but the fact he’d done one of our very own NYC Joey Peroni blew me away. He painted it from Joey’s photo. Kid you not. Clever stuff. Here it is:


He said he works alongside another Stephen who has helped him realise his dream after he was discovered painting peanuts on a windowsill in Peterborough.

Click on this link to see where the other Stephen displays both Pigasso’s and his own work.

Nice one, Pigasso. Cheers for painting it. I sent it to Joey earlier and he’s already been in touch to say he loves it. He also wonders if he can get a framed thumbnail for his ledge?

So, Brighton being the creative hub that it is, there’s got to be pigeons down here doing stuff. I’m on a mission. Pigeons who do art is an untapped movement, and I think I could be onto something if Gary and Pigasso are anything to go by.

Bring it on.

November 21, 2013. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

‘Flight Control’ By Gary Pigeon

This is it. Finally. The moment you’ve all been waiting for, and I’m sure you’ll agree it’s been worth it.

Ex-pat NYC street artist Gary Pigeon’s work, ‘Flight Control':

Flight Control


He apologised for the length of time it took to send it through but said he wanted to make sure the photograph captured the piece in a way that maximised the poignancy of the statement. He also said he struggled with the camera as photography isn’t really his thing.

His inspiration came from wanting to highlight the hardship experienced by the millions of pigeons suffering from foot issues. It’s not something we like to talk about.

Initially he was going to scratch a small foot onto a drainpipe, until he had the brilliant idea of using wet concrete. However, having decided on the medium he wanted to use to express himself, he had to wait two years for a suitable patch of wet cement to come up. Eventually, it did. That’s dedication for you.

“I wanted it to be out in the open. Right there. On the street for everyone to see.” He said.

What he’s hoping, now he’s revealed himself as the artist responsible, is that some New York art mag might be interested in doing a piece. They should. It’s not often a pigeon’s art gets recognised never mind written about.

Nice one, Gary. He’s going to keep in touch and let me know what he’s working on next. He’s also going to tell me the full story of how the he ended up in New York in the first place. Joey told me it had something to do with getting hammered near Heathrow and falling asleep in the under-carriage of a plane about to take off for JFK. Slept through the whole thing, apparently.

November 11, 2013. Uncategorized. 12 comments.

Gary The NY Street Artist Pigeon Gets In Touch

So, having recovered from my incarceration in Eastbourne stuck under a bridge with the world’s dullest pigeon, I’m back to business.

Had a couple of emails from Joey in NYC. He says life in New York is calming down a bit now Banksy has nearly finished. It’s also the reason why Gary, Joey’s ex-pat street artist pal – see last post, has been so hard to get hold of. He’s a massive fan, apparently, and has been trying to follow Banksy around to see what he looks like.

Unfortunately, same as everyone, he missed him every time. However he did manage to leave his own artistic mark near his favourite piece in TriBeCa, which even got a mention in the New York Times in the form of a quote by a local chef called Mr Mears:

‘…some of Banksy’s pieces were “poignant,” but [Mears] expressed disdain for Banksy’s followers, some of whom he said sat in pigeon droppings to pose for photos alongside the TriBeCa piece…’

New York Times, Oct 28th 2013

You can read the rest of the article here.

Apparently Gary was disappointed it didn’t get more of a mention as he’d worked hard on the placing and distance from the piece. He was also disappointed someone had sat in it.

He clearly knows his stuff though.

Joey sent me this. It’s a picture of him and Gary on the ‘Pigeons Do Art March’ back in September. It’s where pigeons from all over New York get together to discuss and practice art.

Gary (right) was running a workshop called, ‘Graffiti Matters':

Great pic.

Yesterday Gary sent me a brief email. He’s obviously not as adept as Joey on the tablet. Typing was all over the place. Guess you can’t be good at everything. Still, I worked it out in the end. He says he’s going to send me a picture of a piece he did a few years ago called ‘Flight Control’. He also said it was his first departure from using his own shit. Exciting stuff.

Nice one, Gary. Look forward to seeing it.

October 30, 2013. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

Joey from NYC

Last week I mentioned that a pigeon from New York got in touch. His name is Joey Peroni, as in the beer. His family were also originally from the Italian quarter in Chicago, which is how he knows Rocco (see last post).

Anyway, we’ve had a few emails backwards and forwards. Top pigeon. Seriously. Great sense of humour and likes a drink, unlike most other American pigeons, according to Joey.

Here he is:

It’s a good look, pose aside.

Turns out Joey has always wanted to come to London. He even tried to kick off a Pigeon Exchange Programme a few years back, but there weren’t enough takers. Not surprising seeing as I was one of the only pigeons online at the time. I’d have done it if I’d known you back then, Joey.

I’ve learnt loads about NYC. It does sound like the dog’s bollox of a place to be. I told him I’d had dealings with the people over there that organise National Pigeon Appreciation Day. Said I’d tried to get the ball rolling on one in London, but didn’t get very far, largely due to pigeons not being appreciated by anyone, not even the weirdos.

I told him about all the anti-pigeon activity that’s been going on over here the past few years. The feeding ban, increase in the use of spikes, serial killer hawks etc. I also told him that there was a huge protest fly-by back in 2009. It was genius.

Pigeons from as far afield as Northampton and Bedford.

Amazing stuff:

Click on the link below for more, and work your way up from the bottom for the full story.


It was also round about the time I had my Operation Stop The Squirrel going on, but that’s another story.

He replied saying it’s the same over there with the rise of the anti-pigeon vibe, and sent me a photo of a sign:

He said nearly all the squares have them now.

So, me and Joey are going to keep in touch. Also, knowing I’m a bit of an art fan, he’s going to hook me up with another pigeon. A ex-pat street artist called Gary. Looking forward to that one.

Another interesting bit of lowdown is that Joey uses a tablet. Much easier than a keyboard, apparently. I’ve never given one a shot. All he has to do is tap his toes on the letters on the screen. He said it’s the way to go, apart from the scrolling which can be a pain in the arse, literally.

May have to give it a go.

In the meantime, big up to my new American pals.

October 21, 2013. Uncategorized. 7 comments.

A Pigeon Called Rocco From Chicago

Email really is a genius invention, especially for pigeons. In the old days it was us that transported messages. Millions of them. The day to day life of a pigeon was nothing but carrying around small bits of paper with writing on. We were the original Internet.

Nowadays, we don’t need to go anywhere near the message. In fact, I haven’t seen an actual message for years. The messages come to us, online. What’s even better is we get to send them too, providing the whole jumping around on a keyboard thing has been mastered of course (see previous post).

The story I’m about to tell you is the perfect example of how well this works. A pigeon got in touch from Chicago recently. Kid you not. All the way from across the pond in Chicago. The name’s Rocco. He actually called himself ‘Big’ Rocco. Not sure why. He doesn’t look very big in the picture.

He’s the one on the left with the slightly odd neckerchief going on:


He said he’d been reading Pigeon Blog for a while and thought he’d send me an email. How simple is that? There’s no way I’d have got that message before the Internet came along.

Have to say, Chicago sounds like my kind of town. Big history of gangster pigeons back in the day, apparently. One in particular, weirdly also called  Rocco.

Rocco discovered how to make alcohol out of cat piss. He had a thing going on in the Italian quarter where he’d kidnap pigeons from other parts of town and offer them up to the local cats in return for their piss, which he’d then turn into alcohol. Total genius. Apparently it’s where the term ‘get pissed’ comes from.

This is where he lived. It’s also where Rocco and most of the other uptown pigeons live now. Plenty of ledges and pretty central:


He’s not wrong there. Never seen so many ledges. Unfortunately he did say that most of the buildings these days are ledge-free. I’ve told him the same thing is happening in London. Ledges are a thing of the past.

Anyway, Rocco and me are going to stay in contact, and he’s also going to put me in touch with a couple of pals of his in New York.

Good times. Here’s to the Internet.

October 11, 2013. Uncategorized. 8 comments.

Where’s Brian?

Loads of you have been asking where I’ve been. In fact, it’s so long since I did a post, WordPress have even gone and changed their user interface, including the ability to ‘add a poll’. So now I might add a poll just for the hell of it. No idea what about. Maybe a poll asking whether you like polls? Who knows. It also has a button that says ‘distraction free writing mode’. WTF? I just pressed it and nothing happened. Mart’s still wanging on and the sun’s still shining. Oh well.

Unfortunately the basic typing method hasn’t changed. It’s still me jumping about on letter keys no bigger than my toe. Occasionally one gets stuck. Happened the other day on the letter P. It’s a tricky business. Always has been. The whole typing effort is also the reason I’ve been absent from the longer form post. I sprained my foot. Twitter’s 140 characters was all I could bloody manage. There. I said it. I sprained my fucking foot. Jesus it hurt. How, you might ask? Let’s just say a puddle of beer was involved followed by an embarrassing incident at The Clock Tower.

So, I’m still in Brighton and it’s been a rocking summer, injury aside. Wall-to-wall hotness, and it’s still going on. A far cry from last summer that’s for sure. In fact, had we had this summer last summer, I may have stayed in London. A long stretch of sustained sunshine is always a winner. I bet even Coventry looked alright this summer. Then again, maybe not.

This is mainly where I’ve been spending my days. It’s a cafe called The Meeting Place down on the seafront. It’s the best place by miles for some decent throwaway, and is a great place to meet new pigeons:

And, as you’ll see from this next pic, it’s got a great view too.

This is Bill, or I think his name was Bill. Can’t really remember as he didn’t say much:

Only snag with The Meeting Place, as it’s bang on the seafront, is it does tend to attract the tourists. Not that I’m exactly a local, but you know what I mean.

Tourists like this total twat in a hat. A hat that he’d fashioned out of his own arse feathers:

All the rage in Swansea, apparently. Knob.

We all ignored him and he went away in the end.

So, what next? Summer’s coming to an end. The autumn then, I guess. Let’s hope it’s a nice gentle one. Bit of sunshine gradually easing us towards Christmas. Jesus. Christmas. Did I just say that?

I’ve got no clue what Brighton will be like at Christmas. Word on the street is there’s loads of parties. Sounds good to me, so long as I stay away from that fucking Clock Tower.

September 5, 2013. Uncategorized. 7 comments.

Brighton Fast Becoming One Big Throwaway

There are two major factors influencing the content of this post: The current bin man strike in Brighton, and the resultant angry seagulls.

So, first off, there’s been zero bin emptying down here for three days and already it looks like this:

Throwaway everywhere.

Basically a town-sized free-for-all:

Yesterday I managed a warm pepperoni pizza slice and an egg mayonnaise roll piece washed down with a bit of cappuccino. This morning I found myself several beaks of trifle. Sweet as, literally. It was only Morrison’s, but I couldn’t fault it.

Basically, whatever you fancy, it’s out there, which means it’s going to get busy when the rest of the UK pigeon population find out (like now, for example). Carnage. Apparently the strike is on till Friday so, as you read this, pigeons everywhere will be hitting the skies, and why wouldn’t they? Brighton needs to be prepared though so I’ve already warned the Pigeon Refuge, and anyone out there with space on their ledge or balcony, you may need to share.

However, despite the fact we should be partying right now, be warned. There are the a few other not-so-nice fuckers tucking into the piles that you need to be wary of. The rats have already appeared, armed and dangerous. Then there are the seagulls. The angry big white seagulls claiming their turf. Those great big fuck-off birds that I thought I’d got to know. Not a bit of it. Every single one of them has gone mental. Off their nut after too much sugar thinking they own it all. Considering most of them have just had kids too, over-feeding on top of a lack of sleep is never a good combination for a seagull. Be warned, and be on your guard. A rat carrying a stick is nothing compared to an angry deranged gull.

A couple of final tips: When going into one of the larger piles, hold your breath. The smell isn’t pleasant and NEVER stick your beak into the small black plastic bags tied together at the top. They’ve got dog shit in them.

Apart from all that, enjoy, and don’t forget to drink plenty of water.

June 19, 2013. Uncategorized. 9 comments.

Brighton Life

It’s been a while since I’ve done a long one like this. Basically, what with all the Tweeting, twitting and twatting about, I haven’t had time. Nor, to be honest, have I had the connections to facilitate it. Despite doing it for as many years as I have, being a pigeon that blogs isn’t always easy. Not every fucker appreciates a random pigeon flying through the window and jumping all over their laptop, unless they’re expecting one of course, so negotiating those kind of arrangements can be problematic. Someone told me there’s a pigeon-friendly public library down here. Is there fuck. It doesn’t even have ledges. How am I supposed to find the PCs without ledges? I’m pretty sure the windows don’t open either.

Anyway, problem solved. I now have a couple of sources down here happy to help, providing I clean up after myself. Of course as usual, their identities have to remain anonymous in case they get done for encouraging free speech of the pigeon. It wouldn’t be the first time.

So, what have I been up to? I won’t bore you with the throwaway stories but, safe to say, getting something half decent to eat down here is a load easier than in London. It’s smaller for a start and, for some reason, more people tend to drop their food. Don’t know why. Come Friday and Saturday nights getting our beaks round some casual spillage is a piece of piss, especially round the the pier, and even better when the weather’s good. The best is when one of us spots a big group all wearing the same clothes. Think it’s called a hen party. Not sure why though seeing as none of them ever dress like hens. Once we’ve clocked one, we follow them around and just eat whatever gets dropped on the way. Usually starts out with crisps and peanuts, includes lager and sometimes fizzy wine, and always ends up with chips and kebabs. Genius. For those of us who manage to stay the distance, it’s a right result and a great night out, providing you don’t tuck into the puke later like Mart did. Not pleasant.

So, just in case anyone’s wondering what happened between myself and the sweet lady I saw in Queen’s Park? The vision of beauty who lived in a window box in Hove? Turns out to be a right nutter, and not in a good way. Her name’s Alice.

I decided I’d meet her in Queen’s Park in the end. Figured if it turned out to be a disaster, I had a getaway. I knew that soon as I’d sat in her box there’d be no escaping. Call me cynical, but it’s happened before. I thought this way we could keep it casual, hang out a bit, and see if it clicked…

Jesus. Total waste of time. She had nothing to say. Nothing at all. She just did this giggle shit whenever I asked her a question, and I mean banal questions like: ‘How long did it take you to fly here?’, ‘How long have you been in Brighton?’ and ‘What’s your favorite nest padding?’. Questions that were in no way funny. Not even slightly.

This was all I got. Truly dire:

Conclusion: Bonkers.

After I’d decided to call it a day, I also happened to notice none of the other pigeons were talking to her either. Funny that. I’ve seen her up there since then. Thankfully she doesn’t seem to know who I am. Total result and a lucky escape.

Other news is we had to move from the first ledge. Not sheltered enough when the winds were kicking in. I didn’t fancy a dusty cliff hole or a dodgy plank under the pier, so went for this instead:

Nice area, solidly built and it’s got a roof. Unfortunately we have to share, but you can’t have everything.

So here’s to summer. Hopefully that wasn’t it last week or I will be pissed.

June 10, 2013. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

Gull Fest 2013

At last, life is starting to sort itself out down here. Met some great new mates including a number of sea gulls. Hate to say it but I take back everything bad I’ve ever said about them. Far from dull, a fair few of them have been hilarious with a surprisingly dry wit. Clive who we met the other day wants to teach me to swim. Could be interesting. Of course Mart asked him if he taught surfing too. Said he was planning to make himself a surfboard out of tooth picks. Jesus.

Best bit is we’ve managed to sort ourselves a half decent ledge in the better end of a place called Kemp Town. Near enough to the action for warm chips, but far enough away to get some sleep on a Friday night, and it’s also only a five minute fly to the middle. Genius.

The pigeon refuge was fun for a while – see last post, and it was great to meet pigeons like Tony, but it can get a bit much. Everywhere you turn there’s a pigeon wanting to chat. You just want to tell them to fuck off, but you can’t.

Now we’ve finally got our own pad, we can start to kick back. The shit clearing rule stays though.

At the weekend, during a classic game of Shit or Miss over the Brighton Marathon, the sun even managed to come out. At long fucking last it seems the longest winter ever is coming to an end. Surely a hot summer is in order to make up for it?

All in all, life is good, and it’s possibly about to get a whole lot better…

Today, I met the pigeon of my dreams. She reminded me a bit of a pigeon I was into years ago called Mary. Something I won’t be mentioning.

Clive had invited Mart and me to Gull Fest. Gull Fest is an annual event for the local sea gulls held in a place called Queen’s Park.

He told us that not many pigeons get the nod. He wasn’t wasn’t wrong:

Even though it was banging, we did feel a bit awkward at first.

Think the ducks were feeling it too:

Turned out to be a right laugh in the end.

A highlight for me was when one of the funniest gulls I’ve ever seen did a routine about swans and sparrows. Last time I saw her was on a mini-break in Brighton last year.

She’s called Harriet but likes to be known as Harry.

Yes, It is a female:

She was fucking funny. Mart and me pissed ourselves.

Anyway, there I was hanging out chatting away to a pigeon called Andy who talked a lot when, suddenly, a vision walked in front of me. Nearly spat out my own tongue. Never seen anything so lovely:

She was drop dead gorgeous. I asked Andy to see if he could find out any detail on the whereabouts of her ledge.

She totally ignored him. Hilarious:

Then I found out what he was saying: “Excuse me. My friend over there. See him. Over there. He wants to know where you live.”

Jesus. No wonder. Probably thought he was some fruitcake stalker.

But then, thankfully, she changed her mind:

She told him she lived in a window-box in Hove. Think we might be hooking up at the weekend.

Wish me luck. Not been on a date for years. May even have a wash.

Only kidding.

April 17, 2013. Uncategorized. 10 comments.

Brighton – Here We Are

We’re here, finally, having done one of the hardest flys ever including an emergency stop-over in Crawley after battling gale force winds down the M23.  Nightmare and totally knackering. Then, pretty much soon as we get to Brighton, it turns into the Arctic fucking Tundra. Kid you not. WTF? Nearly April and it’s chucking down freezing snow. This time last year we were boiling our arses off.

Not on. Ended up spending our first night here. It’s a refuge for homeless pigeons:

Couldn’t be arsed to go hunting for a dream ledge in this weather.

It’s actually turned out to be be quite a laugh in the end. We even managed a bit of a sing along yesterday to keep warm. Genius, until one of them suggested the soundtrack from Mama Mia.

We’re thinking we might stay here for a bit, or at least till the weather get’s better. The others don’t seem to mind and there’s plenty of room. In fact, it turns out one of them called Tony has been staying here for two and a half years.

This is Tony (right) on the window ledge:

Said he’d flown away from Worthing one day because he was bored, and landed in Brighton. He’d planned to settle on a nice ledge but ended up here and just stayed on. He was reluctant to say why, so I didn’t push it.

“We look out for eachother and help to keep the place clean.” He said. “It’s more of a commune than a refuge.” Nice one, and definitely the place to be for now.

Come on Spring. Get your shit together.

March 25, 2013. Uncategorized. 5 comments.

Brighton Here We Come

It’s decided. We’re moving to Brighton. If these Arctic conditions continue, at least we’ll be freezing our arses off by the sea. Mart’s bang up for it. London in this weather is just depressing.

This was us yesterday near Marble Arch:

So cold we couldn’t even be bothered to speak, and then it rained. It rained all bloody day. Miserable.

Not sure where we’re going to end up yet. Possibly the Marina. Got taken there the other day. Not only is there a massive MacDonalds, it’s got a car park and a drive through which means people drive through, eat in the car park and then chuck what’s left out of the window. Genius. Burger throwaway everywhere, and some of it was still warm.

This is one of our new pals, Clive. It was Clive who told us about it:

Get in there Clive.

Even met a half decent sea gull called Boris (in the middle).

I think Brighton is going to rock and, who knows, maybe I’ll try out a few dates? I’ll definitely be checking out the stand-up scene. Whatever occurs, it’s going to be a damn sight better than sitting on a wall near Marble Arch in the pissing rain.

If anyone can recommend any decent available ledges, let me know.

March 18, 2013. Uncategorized. 18 comments.

Valentine’s Day Disaster

If you’re wondering why you haven’t heard from me for a while, I’ll tell you. In all the years of writing this blog I have never suffered any injuries. Not one. Pretty amazing all things considered. Some might say flying about with a camera strapped to me might be hazardous to say the least, but no. Nothing.

It also has to be said that in all the years of doing this I have never given a flying fuck about Valentine’s Day either. Apart from anything else I’ve not really had much cause to if you get my drift.

This year, they both come at once. Total nightmare.

Met a half decent bird a couple of weeks ago called Sally. We got on pretty well and seemed to have quite a bit in common like being interested in bagels and trying out different types of  nut. We even agreed on a favourite – the Brazil. She seemed pretty into me writing Pigeon Blog for as long as I have too (even though she said she’d never read it). Anyway, cut a long story short I decided to take her out on Valentine’s Day. Mart suggested a throwaway on Brick Lane, but I wanted to go a bit more up market. If I was in the zone for a possible legover I had to get it right, so I decided on a sunset ride on a Millennium Wheel pod. Perfect. Both of us staring into out over London. Wings slightly touching. I’ve never done it myself but heard it’s pretty easy to hold on and doesn’t go that fast.

So – Feb 14th comes. I get up and go for the necessary wash in Leicester Square and what happens? I stub my fucking toe getting out. Never been in so much pain. Jesus. Couldn’t walk. Couldn’t stand. Swelled up like a fucking potato. Just had to get back in the water and sit there while Mart went to tell Sally the date was off.

Thankfully the toe has gone down a bit now so hopefully we can do it next week instead. Tell you one thing though – never again will I ever mention the word Valentine.

February 18, 2013. Uncategorized. 8 comments.

Snow Gone. Time To Move On…

As always happens in London, the snow all came and went in a couple of days. Up to our knees we were in a slushy nightmare. Anyway, sledging was fun even though all we managed to do was tow each other around a bit. Turned out that carrying a foil throwaway box in the air any distance was too much like hard work. Good times, unlike now. Really not much going on in London at all these days. As far as I can make out, there’s not much happening this year full stop. Flat as a soggy pancake.

2012 was all about massive amounts of tourists and parties, and then there was the Olympics and my stint at Time Out. This year, nothing. Nada. Fuck all, so I’m considering moving to Brighton. Been there a couple of times and there’s a pretty good scene going on.

Put it this way, this was the biggest laugh we’ve had since the snow:

Eating shit off the floor in Waterloo Station, and that was only because it was pissing down. Hardly comedy genius.

At least in Brighton you can get yourself a nice sunny-aspect ledge like this one and stare out to sea all day:

Bit of coastal meditation could do me the world of good. Change my perspective a bit. Get the old creative juices going again, especially if I can crack the comedy scene down there. Heard the pigeons in Hove have got a great night going on under the pier on a Wednesday.

For a start, I know I’d write a whole lot more because I’d actually have something interesting to write about.

I mentioned the idea to Mart who was right into it soon as I mentioned the word ‘explore’. He said he’d love nothing better than to spend his days exploring just like in the film, ‘The Explorers’. Jesus.
Anyway, watch this space.

January 30, 2013. Uncategorized. 8 comments.

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