My Time Out Olympic Commentary Starts Today
I’ve already mentioned this, but thought I’d mention it again as it starts today. In fact, as it’s a weekly gig, I’ll probably mention it every week. Or every day, even.
I have a job. A proper job. No more random wanging on about the ups and downs of day to day life as a London pigeon, or maybe still a bit of that. It’s time for some focus.
A couple of weeks ago, Time Out magazine came up and asked me if I wanted to be their Olympic Commentator. Even though I’ll still be involved in the Pigeon Olympics, they’re talking the whole shebang. The real macoy. Nearly had a fucking heart attack. Of course, I said yes. Actually, I think I nodded. Had a beak full of pizza at the time.
So, that’s it. Exciting stuff. Now all I have to do is think of some interesting shit to write about… Best stay off the Stella for a couple of days. Need to get my head round this one. I have a deadline. Jesus. I have a deadline.
Anyway, the first issue is TODAY. That’s TODAY. Go buy it if you can. Page 6.
I’m off to do some commenting.
Cynthia Anderson replied:
Good luck Brian! Wow…OC…you’re the man—er—bird!
June 27, 2012 at 10:58 am. Permalink.
pigeonblog replied:
Cheers. Have to say, loving the proper job. Never had one before!
Your pal
Bri
June 27, 2012 at 6:54 pm. Permalink.
Michael Rowe replied:
I think Canvey Island may be your closest “tax haven” (I may have that wrong – not sure). More seriously, Wimbledon is reported to be a “no fly” area – wheretofor the Olympic stadium?
June 27, 2012 at 11:02 am. Permalink.
pigeonblog replied:
I believe it is. Yes. I’ve yet to uncover whether they’ve employed a hawk to patrol though. That could scupper things somewhat.
Your pal
Bri
June 27, 2012 at 6:55 pm. Permalink.
Animalcouriers replied:
Oh crap. Work. Nice if you can get it though. Can’t get a copy of Time Out here but will see if a mate can. Good luck pigeon reporter
June 27, 2012 at 1:21 pm. Permalink.
Selina Giles replied:
I enjoy your quality wanging. Good luck Brian. Is fair to say you are the right bird for the job.
June 27, 2012 at 2:27 pm. Permalink.
pigeonblog replied:
Cheers Selina. Bring on the pigeons and 2012!
Your good pal
Bri
June 27, 2012 at 6:59 pm. Permalink.
pigeonblog replied:
Nice one. Next week’s column will be on their blog too. Happy days!
June 27, 2012 at 6:58 pm. Permalink.
andi sharp replied:
Can us northerners get to read your Time Out missive online as we cant get a ‘real’ copy?
June 27, 2012 at 8:08 pm. Permalink.
RoooRoooo replied:
Cheers! Hope they pay you with nice seeds and fresh crumbs, you’ll need that to be in shape and cover the events.
RoooRoooo
June 28, 2012 at 1:41 pm. Permalink.
Ham replied:
Well done, that bird! I can see why they haven’t asked you to cover Wimbledon, though https://twitter.com/rufusthehawk
June 28, 2012 at 2:55 pm. Permalink.
pigeonblog replied:
Cheers, and thanks for the heads up on Rufus. Can’t believe they gave him a Twitter account!
Your pal
Bri
June 28, 2012 at 3:00 pm. Permalink.
confused pigeon replied:
Is your email broken Brian??
June 29, 2012 at 2:39 pm. Permalink.
pigeonblog replied:
No. Don’t think so anyway. Trouble getting through?
June 29, 2012 at 3:54 pm. Permalink.
confused pigeon replied:
Try checking it again you ledge lounging layabout. Are you out of your head on sick and Stella again?
June 29, 2012 at 4:57 pm. Permalink.
pigeonblog replied:
Now I’m bloody confused. Are you an otter or a pigeon? Maybe you’re confused, which is odd seeing as one has fur and the other has feathers…
June 29, 2012 at 6:06 pm. Permalink.
confused pigeon replied:
Read the email you feathered freak. This is what happens when pigeons get ahead of themselves and try to use email and the net. Stick to delivering other people’s messages on your leg. And tweeting is just not right, are you a pigeon or a tit?
June 29, 2012 at 8:54 pm. Permalink.
confused pigeon replied:
Millions of people will be watching the olympics. The last thing we want is a drunken grey and blond wanker staggering along the edge of the stadium roof singing ‘Feed the birds’ and vomiting on the running track. If you play your cards right they might fit you into that opening ceremony english country scene as a wood pigeon. It’s easy enough, puff yourself up and slap some orange lipstick on your beak. I’m sure you’re used to slapping stuff on, you metrosexual twat.
June 29, 2012 at 5:17 pm. Permalink.
pigeonblog replied:
Unfortunately orange isn’t really my colour. Shame though. Could have worked.
June 29, 2012 at 6:10 pm. Permalink.
confused pigeon replied:
Because it’s Sunday and Brian is probably upside down on top of a telephone box down Hammersmith out of his head on Ribena and digestive biscuits, I am doing this morning’s breaking news:
All pigeons who wish to view the tennis can now go and do so as Rufus the hawk has been stolen from the car he was being kept in overnight.
July 1, 2012 at 8:43 am. Permalink.
confused pigeon replied:
by the way I do hope he is found soon and is OK after this unpleasant crime against a wild creature, neither hawks nor pigeons deserve it.
July 1, 2012 at 9:10 am. Permalink.