It’s All Kicking Off In NW6 or “Pigeons – Twats With Wings”

Says Al from the NW6 Pigeon Appreciation Society, who sent me this rather horrific set of pictures. Cheers, Al.

There he was strolling through a park when he witnessed first hand the aggressive tendencies of the urban squirrel. Thankfully, the art of Kung Fu – see posts below – hasn’t quite reached NW6 yet so this was, apparently, largely a vocal attack.

A squirrel appears out of nowhere and just sits there hurling verbal insults at a group of innocent pigeons out and about enjoying a quiet moment in the park:

“Oi pigeons – twats with wings. Over ‘ere!”

They try their damnedest to ignore him…

…even when he attempts to arse-spray one of them in the eyes. Jesus. Not pleasant. Not even slightly.

The final straw comes when another one rocks up giving it large:

“Call yourself a bird? Get your wings up and fight like a pigeon.”

Thankfully, and somewhat typically for NW6, these two were all mouth.

Henry, normally a fairly placid pigeon by nature, gives them the evil and simply tells them to fuck off. Such was the look in his eye that they scarper sharp as:

Fair play. Good on ya, Henry. A fine example to all those pigeons out there intimidated by the urban squirrel. Don’t be, unless of course they look like they’ve mastered a martial art…

In the meantime, 2009 – bring it on. Aside from the fact we appear to have entered the initial stages of the next Ice Age, I’m pretty excited about the whole affair and was discussing with Mart what our New Year resolutions might be. He suggested we keep things simple, unlike last year when, I seem to remember, Mart’s list included the invention of teleportation and learning how to play the ukulele. Admittedly mine weren’t much better, like flying over the Grand Canyon and speed reading all 21 volumes of the 1801 edition of the Encyclopedia Britannica. Wtf? Talk about setting oneself up for disappointment.

2009 I’m thinking:

1) Eat more

2) Fly more

3) Do more

Nice.

January 6, 2009. Uncategorized.

2 Comments

  1. Annie Mole replied:

    There was some deffo squaring up for food going on between you lot and squirrels in St James’s Park today. The problem is that the squirrels were doing they’re “We’re really cute, but too scared to eat out of your hand” coy thing, which was winning a lot of tourists over. Whereas your lot stood in the sidelines looking a bit sulky. I think it’s time to raise your game!

  2. pigeonblog replied:

    Annie Mole: Spot on. They’re learning fast. Trouble is, a bit of flying about and cooing just doesn’t seem to cut it anymore. The tourists dig the fucking fur. Simple as. You’re right tho, something has to be done, and clearly the ‘flying away’ tactic just isn’t working!
    Your pal
    Bri

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